Loose Women

loosemingesNow, according to The Law Unto Hucknall (which I made up myself, and thus can cite with confidence), people should be listed individually with their individual lack of merits detailed individually. In this case however, I shall make an exception. It would be very easy to pad out a chunk of the 1000 people with each and every single “woman” that’s ever been a panellist on ITV’s “Loose Women” but frankly, I don’t feel like giving them that much space or attention. So I am lumping them into one post.

If you aren’t familiar with the show, and I sincerely hope for your sake that is the case, then basically I can describe it thus. It’s like Scrapheap Challenge, but instead of manly men building interesting things competitively in order to provide fulsome entertainment, the Scrapheap itself has been given it’s own show and invited to comment on topical items of the day in front of a studio audience made mostly out of other bits of the scrapheap that didn’t ever make it to be famous.

Now, I should point out, that I am a lady, of sorts, anyway. I’m not the most delicate and feminine of girls, I have all the right lady parts and am definitely identifiable as female, but I’m not a girly girl by any stretch of the imagination. When you are six foot odd and built like a brick shithouse, it’s pretty impossible to get away with flicking your hair back, giggling lightheartedly and talking about kittens. Although kittens ARE pretty cool. But even if I was two foot seven and shaped like a cotton bud, I still don’t think it would be in me to be able to do those things. I’m far too lazy, for one thing.

It just doesn’t interest me. It’s the way I am. Not a thing I can do about it.  So, you can imagine that something like “Loose Women” is not something that is likely to appeal to me anyway. I’m sure lots of people find it entertaining, I suppose if they didn’t then it wouldnt have been recommissioned endlessly.

Packed to the absolute brim of the cauldron with former soap actresses, former reality stars, former wives of famous people, former frontswomen of meaty stock cube advertising campaigns, etc etc etc etc, it’s notable that the word FORMER is relevant in nearly every single case.

Now, I don’t dispute that it is important for older people, of both genders, to be appearing on TV and showing us that life goes on beyond the twenties. But this format and this concoction does no favours for the positive reinforcement of that message. Instead, it tells us that by middle age, women should be bitter old careworn harridans who have nothing better to do than bitch at one another, until one of them gets so stressed out they have a nosebleed and have to be carted off to hospital.

They are not setting a good example, in my opinion, for the middle aged or older generation. It’s tawdry, and it’s not good TV. 

But then, it’s pretty much typical of ITV these days. Long gone are the days where Farmhouse Kitchen, Emmerdale Farm, The Sullivans and Crown Court were the daytime viewing choices on offer – and perhaps that’s not a bad thing either, but if this is the choice of a new generation, then that generation should be given a very stern talking to at the least, or potentially given community service for crimes against public broadcasting.

Come back, A Country Practice, all is forgiven.

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4 Responses to “Loose Women”

  1. The last time I watched daytime TV it was catching an episode of Bod, to see what hilarious antics Farmer Barlimow would be up to this week… Oh hahaha – Farmer Barlimow, you are a card!

    However, in between discussing the ‘life and times’ of kittens with my girlie friends, they do mention Loose Woman and yes, I slap them into submission quick-sharp.

    One recommends that Loose women change their unchristian show name into ‘Tied, Trussed & Gagged Women’ to increase show ratings – I for one would tune in and recommend some winning recipes for these battery hens!

  2. saffy255 Says:

    Having just had three weeks off work, at the start, I thought I’d poke my head in tp see what all the fuss was about with LW.

    What a mistake!!!!

    Never in my life have I watched such shite… I don’t get the attraction…. plus they seem to be saying that it’s ok for you to laze around all day and not a) go to work b) actually look after your kids or c) do any housework.

    I was prescribed a “gentle walk” each day I was off – I started taking that walk when LW was on!!!!

    And Gill, don’t you think they shoul dbring back Crown Court? That was fab!!!

    • Blinking Norah Saffy – you are the TRUE voice of reason!

      a) I loved Crown Court – specially the dramatic theme tune and stern manner.

      b) I can now see from where my lazy arse lush friends are being influenced! They don’t work, have nannies, cleaners & even gardeners! Yet they watch LOOSE WOMEN! Whilst necking expensive chardonnay I may add. Burn those vile witches at the stake – come on peeps – NOW! Especially that annoying ‘lead’ one who looks like Barry Manilow’s sister…

  3. clackdish Says:

    haveing shagged all of them apart from prune faced mcgiffen i have to agree that they are all in need of a little tightening in the front bottom area,
    was like throwing a wellie down the local high street…nuff said

    love ya all ladies
    ha ha ha ha dont tell mrs clack minxo ………lollers

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